Episode 300 - Mike Read's Pop Quiz

Jan 25, 2021

Mike Read has made many things he should be ashamed of. A racist UKIP Calypso song, a board game based on a rubbish TV quiz, and a TV quiz which would subsequently be made into a rubbish board game. We examine two of those things this week. Happy 300 episodes!

Episode 301 - Dungeons & Dragons RE-RE-REVISITED

Feb 1, 2021

"Ranger... Barbarian... Magician... Thief... Cavalier... and Acrobat!"

100 more episodes have gone by, so Mark and Martyn re-re-revisit the first episode of W4B by re-re-rewatching the first episode of Dungeons and Dragons. Again. Because they said
they would. And they are stupid.

Re-re-reliving all the fun and adventure of a group of abandoned teenagers hampered in their quest to get home by a small mewling unicorn. For a fourth time. It's just as good as it sounded every other time before.

Episode 302 - NOW... that's what I call the 80s-est 80s music videos 3

Feb 8, 2021

We decide to look at some more 80s music videos, and start off with three of Mark's picks. So roll up your jacket sleeves, grab a pair of legwarmers and get ready to dance to the sound of two men talking over all the music. Boooo!

Episode 303 - NOW... that's what I call the 80s-est 80s music videos 4

Feb 15, 2021

Three more music videos get talked over this week, but luckily Martyn's picks are mostly boring so you're not missing anything.

Episode 304 - Sylvanian Families

Feb 22, 2021

How do you make a cartoon out of woodland creatures living in doll houses? Add some unnecessary human kids, several layers of reality, a vampire villain and a rejected Wuzzle.

Episode 305 - Super Mario World

Mar 1, 2021

Arguably the best video game series ever made has only ever received the worst cartoon spin-offs. Super Mario World is apparently a blast from the past. But what's your favourite kind of blast? Let us know.

Episode 306 - Hickory House

Mar 8, 2021

A cushion puppet competes with a man in tight trousers for the most inappropriate bulge on a kids' TV show, as we watch Hickory House before washing our eyes out with bleach.

Episode 307 - Rocky Hollow

Mar 15, 2021

Time for a proper forgotten nightmare fuel treat this week as we watch Rocky Hollow, which definitely didn't exist but is also definitely going to crawl out of whatever screen you're watching it on and kill you.

Episode 308 - Victor & Maria

Mar 22, 2021

A polar bear and a girl try on some coats and nobody asks any questions. It would be perfectly reasonable to ask why she has a polar bear with her. Or even why the polar bear is trying on coats. But nobody does.

Episode 309 - The Karate Kid: The Animated Series

Mar 29, 2021

The Karate Kid has had two TV spin-offs - one is about searching the globe for a magic shrine or something, and the other is just about middle-aged men remembering the 80s. Why would anyone watch or listen to the second one?

Episode 310 - What-A-Mess At The Seaside

Apr 5, 2021

A pile of rubbish pretending to be a dog has adventures and there's rubbish everywhere and we're supposed to be ok with all the rubbish everywhere but it's awful and I hate it. What-A-Fucking-Mess indeed.

Episode 311 - Under The Umbrella Tree

Apr 12, 2021

We learn all about Umbrella Trees using the internet and our own curiosity, with no thanks to this boring bunch of puppet bastards who nobody's ever heard of.

Episode 312 - The Hot Rod Dogs & Cool Car Cats

Apr 19, 2021

We discover what it probably feels like to go mad as we watch a load of vehicle/animal hybrid abominations living in a weird post-apocalyptic landscape. This should have been called "Car-Pets" and I'm annoyed I only just thought of that.

Episode 313 - Bucky O'Hare

Apr 26, 2021

A big green space rabbit and a four-armed duck kidnap a human child to kill toads, and we all went along with it because the theme song was good. Shame on all of us.

Episode 314 - Fox Tales

May 3, 2021

Haunted puppets of woodland creatures lurk in the darkness throughout Fox Tales, which may or may not be a manifestation of our nightmarish collective consciousness.

Episode 315 - Robotix

May 10, 2021

Robotix was a cartoon designed to sell robot toys, and it succeeds... in making us want to buy toys from other robot cartoon toy adverts.

Episode 316 - Kissyfur

May 24, 2021

The lighthearted adventures of some mistreated circus animals dealing with bereavement, train crashes and alligator attacks. Cartoons are fun.

Episode 317 - Noggin The Nog

May 31, 2021

We're supposed to be watching Noggin the Nog, but anyone who's listened before knows there's "Norway" we'll stay on topic, especially when Viking Beadle's About...

Episode 318 - Windfalls

Jun 7, 2021

Leaves come to life and have terrifying felt tip faces in Windfalls, a horrible stop-motion TV show that probably didn't even exist.

Episode 319 - Home James

Jun 14, 2021

This week we're watching Home James, one of the worst things Jim Davidson ever committed to film, including his dressing gown-clad old lady rant in his kitchen. Part one of our tenuous sitcom gingology.

Episode 320 - On The Up

Jun 21, 2021

Dennis Waterman is more than the "write-da-feem-choon-sing-da-feem-choon" caricature Little Britain made him out to be in On The Up, in which the theme tune was... Oh. Never mind.

Episode 321 - Fantastic Max

Jun 28, 2021

This episode was going to be about Home To Roost, but as it's episode 321 we should have made it about 3-2-1. Instead we watched a cartoon about a baby with a ginger mohawk, a spaceship and a robot butler or something.

Episode 322 - Blue Peter

Jul 5, 2021

Blue Peter was boring and if you liked it you were boring too. Mark Curry was a force for chaos, destroying Lego, wearing wacky suits and riding backwards bikes with reckless abandon. Be thankful for Mark Curry. Both of them. All the Mark Currys. Everywhere.

Episode 323 - Towser

Jul 12, 2021

Of all the cartoon dogs with names ending in "owser," Towser is definitely one of them.

Episode 324 - Ric The Raven

Jul 19, 2021

Ric is a blue bird who harrasses bearded men or something. Look it's five minutes long, what more do you want from this?

Episode 325 - Mr Squiggles

Jul 26, 2021

Thanks to our Australian connections we are now aware of Mr Squiggles, a pencil-nosed monster puppet who draws things upside-down, just like all Australians. Fingers crossed, he might draw a willy with his nose.

Episode 326 - Juniper Jungle

Aug 2, 2021

Did you ever wonder what inspired Bobby Ball to write Juniper Jungle? Of course not, nobody cares about Juniper Jungle!

Episode 327 - The Junglies

Aug 9, 2021

Jungle all the way with more jungle fun this week as we watch the Junglies, which is about the jungle and or things that may or may not be from the jungle. Read this out loud and let us know at which point the word jungle lost all meaning.

Episode 328 - Budgie The Little Helicopter

Aug 16, 2021

Budgie is a helicopter with a face whose friends are a load of other vehicles with faces, and nobody wants you to make the comparison to all the other books and TV shows about vehicles with faces, but if you don't do that you have to talk about Sarah Ferguson instead.

Episode 329 - Alphabet Castle

Aug 23, 2021

Alphabet Castle is under siege by the soldiers of Number Castle, and they're pouring boiling oil over the parapets to burn all the Number people whilst battering rams smash through the walls!

Or, someone done a painting of a letter whilst wearing a cardboard crown.

Episode 330 - Words, Words, Words

Aug 30, 2021

What do you get when you cross the Pink Windmill kids with Let's Pretend? This shambles about a load of over-enthusiastic stage school adults jumping about and singing whilst using half a dressing-up box.

Episode 331 - Simon In The Land Of Chalk Drawings

Sep 6, 2021

Simon brings his nightmarish doodles to life using magic chalk, or otherworldly sorcery on normal chalk, or mind-altering narcotics. I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.

Episode 332 - Take Hart

Sep 13, 2021

Tony Hart could probably kill you with his little finger, but instead he lives the peaceful life of some kind of monk in an extra-dimensional workshop where you're safe from the horrible real world, but modelling clay comes to life occasionally.

Episode 333 - Sam On Boff's Island

Sep 20, 2021

We open a portal to hell via Youtube and watch some awful puppets summon Tony Robinson into their infernal domain.

Episode 334 - The Hudson Brothers' Razzle Dazzle Show

Sep 27, 2021

The Hudson Brothers Razzle Dazzle Show has it all - Dazzle, Razzle, the Hudson Brothers... and Rod Hull & Emu!

Episode 335 - Emu's World

Oct 4, 2021

Grotbags looks young and Croc looks diseased in the first episode of Emu's World. Rod Hull and Emu continue to look like an elderly woman using a ratty old toy from a car boot sale as an excuse to assault people.

Episode 336 - Bananas In Pyjamas

Oct 11, 2021

Fruit in clothing is descending from a higher floor. Fruit in clothing is pursuing stuffed animals. This is not a drill, repeat, this is not a drill.

Episode 337 - Further Tales Of The Riverbank

Oct 25, 2021

Some animals have escaped from a pet shop and are pretending that they always lived by a British riverbank, and also that they have human needs and desires. And post offices.

Episode 338 - Games World

Nov 1, 2021

Anything Channel 4 could do, Sky One could do later. Games World had a lot in common with GamesMaster - a scornful mocking host, characters pretending to be good at video games, and Dave Perry hanging around like a bad smell.

Episode 339 - Countdown

Nov 8, 2021

We pay our respects to ever-so-sprightly twice-nightly Richard Whiteley by watching the first ever Countdown and reminiscing about our own Countdown fan fiction from back in the day.

Episode 340 - Michael Bentine's Potty Time

Nov 15, 2021

A giant Michael Bentine looms over some pirate puppets as if it's normal in another kids' tv show that sounds like we made it up.

Episode 341 - Palace Hill

Nov 22, 2021

Take a parody of Grange Hill, add some two-dimensional caricatures of the British Royal family, and you've got Palace Hill. Subversive? Yes. A bit rubbish? Apparently. Did we love it? Of course!

Episode 342 - The Blunders

Nov 29, 2021

The Blunders was a cartoon family sitcom that probably didn't exist and we don't remember it. Do you remember it? NO YOU DON'T YOU LIAR!

Episode 343 - GamesMaster Christmas Special 1993

Dec 6, 2021

Who doesn't love obnoxious shouty presenters swallowing the camera and being nice to Dave Perry? Everyone? Oh well, sorry Dexter Fletcher, GamesMaster isn't for you. Better go and be an incredibly successful movie director instead.

Episode 344 - Bullseye Christmas Special 1990

Dec 13, 2021

Bullseye Christmas specials make a mockery of the format of the game, as professional darts players get good scores, and celebrities answer all the questions correctly in the name of giving to charity. We'll never say no to watching an episode of Bullseye though. Apart from the one with Daphne from Eggheads on it.

Episode 345 - Wheel of Fortune Christmas Special 1988

Dec 20, 2021

N_cky C_mpb_ll _nd s_m_ m_n_r c_l_br_t__s g__ss w_rds w_th__t v_w_ls _n th_ m_st f_st_v_ g_m_sh_w _v_r. S_rry.

Episode 346 - Button Moon (Birthday Special)

Jan 3, 2022

We're off to Button Moon...again, to celebrate Mark's birthday with a bunch of fever dream characters made out of household utensils and kitchen waste. *party popper sound*

Episode 347 - Vintage Sweets & Snack Adverts 1

Jan 10, 2022

Christmas is over, we've all had enough of chocolate and sweets, so we've decided to watch some adverts. For chocolate and sweets.

Episode 348 - Vintage Sweets & Snack Adverts 2

Jan 17, 2022

What's more annoying - adverts that you can't skip, or podcasts about middle-aged men's opinions? Luckily, you don't have to choose.

Episode 349 - Vintage Electronic Games & Toy Adverts

Jan 24, 2022

We watch more vintage adverts to give toys and games from the past some free publicity. If any of the toy companies involved want to go back in time and give our younger selves some free stuff in exchange, please consider using your time machine for something more useful.    

 

Episode 350 - It's a Royal Knockout part 1

Jan 31, 2022

A special episode deserves a special subject, a royal subject, the subject of an investigation perhaps? It's A Royal Knockout is like a massive fever dream, minus breaking into a sweat of course.    

 

Episode 351 - It's A Royal Knockout part 2

Feb 7, 2022

We're not saying George R R Martin was inspired by It's A Royal Knockout, but there's an evil prince and most of the main players are dead. SHAME! SHAME! SHAME! 

Episode 352 - It's A Royal Knockout part 3

Feb 14, 2022

We finally get to the end of the worst thing the royal family has ever done. Forget all the other bad things. Especially that one you're still thinking about. 

Episode 353 - Junior Kickstart

Feb 28, 2022

Junior Kickstart is about men standing around in the woods watching kids fall off motorbikes. And our mums used to wish we'd spend more time outside for some reason.

Episode 354 - Run The Risk

Mar 7, 2022

The best thing we can say about Shane Richie on Run The Risk is that at least he isn't Bobby Davro.  

Episode 355 - On Safari

Mar 14, 2022

Christopher Biggins hosts On Safari whilst looking like Timmy Mallett if he'd eaten Elton John. Also some kids and their parents play games to try and win a telescope or something.  

Episode 356 - The Tomorrow People

Mar 21, 2022

In the 1970s, teenagers were almost indistinguishable from middle-aged adults. Maybe it's because they were all time travellers, or whatever the Tomorrow People are, we don't know, it's confusing.

Episode 357 - The New Lassie

Mar 28, 2022

Lassie's owners are constantly being shot at, set on fire, lost in the wilderness, trapped down wells and being caught in the current of fast-flowing rivers. Exactly the kind of people Battersea would probably deem unfit to care for an animal.